Introducing a very talented, entertaining writer

My daughter Freya is a very talented, witty girl and has embarked upon a new project for the summer.  She has created a site where she reviews live concerts.  Please do take a look at it, as her articles both amusing and informative:

Loving Live Music by Freya de Conde

3rd Anniversary of Fantasy Kingdoms and my Exploration of Facebook

Three years ago, I registered on Facebook and immediately began to explore the games.  FarmVille was recommended to me by friends who played Harvest Moon but a game I discovered by myself entitled 'Fantasy Kingdoms' won my imagination and heart as soon as I began to play it.

Fantasy Kingdoms is a rich, opulent landscape of fantasy and real crops, trees, creatures, magical 'relics' and 'artifacts', castles and other decorations.  It is truly an ideal dreamscape for any one who loves fantasy art and/or literature.  One is able to build multiple Kingdoms using the incredible objects created by the developers.  Some, like the Crops, Trees, Relics and Artifacts are interactive.  Crops are planted, grow and then can be 'frozen' or harvested upon maturity.  Trees can be harvested repeatedly.  It is the Artifacts and Relics, however, that are unique to this game and provide a truly magical experience.

Artifacts are items that must be 'Empowered' by the owner in order to be able to be transformed.  Relics, once placed, simply need to be allowed time to complete their growth.  Sometimes they are in the form of ruins that must be rebuilt through magic.  Only one act of empowerment is required for the Artifacts.  After that, time performs the magic and every Artifact and Relic has a different timeframe for its renewal. 

Like Crops, Artifacts and Relics go through various stages of growth and can be quite different visually from stage to stage.  The creators of this game are generous in their creativity which is another aspect of Fantasy Kingdoms that continues to delight and amaze.  Some games exist to make money, even if the developers have fun while they do it.  Fantasy Kingdoms appears to exist in another realm entirely, where the developers give their hearts and souls to the game in order to enrich THIS world.

Above are a few images of details from my own Fantasy Kingdoms.  One Kingdom shown here is the underwater kingdom and the other is my 'Festival Kingdom', filled with items that were created especially to mark the 1st Year Anniversary of the game.

Pain Management and Virtual Realities

(These three photographs are of Sunsets I have experienced, all in different locations, from the rather blighted neighbourhood in which I now live to the open seas and the Mediterranean.)


'Pain Management' is a fairly new concept but one that should have been implemented a century ago.  It is the last stage of a journey that has seen only failure at every other stop for patients who cannot be 'fixed' with surgical procedures or through other means.  It usually is reserved for individuals for whom there is no cure and thus will not be available until all other avenues have been exhausted.

Pain Management may have saved my life.  I went through almost a year of hell before I was given a referral and the pain and frustration of countless unsuccessful procedures as well as medications to which I had negative reactions (sometimes terrifying) had pushed me to the brink of despair.  If I had not had a child who depended upon me, I wonder if I could have maintained my hold upon sanity and life.  As it was, I finally was sent to a Pain Management physician.

Pain Management offers the recognition of every human being's right to live without pain or at least the right to manage that pain so that it is not unendurable.  It acknowledges that fact that pain is subjective and that every individual is different.  One person may shrug off the pain that causes another to weep uncontrollably. Like Lawrence in one of my favourite films, I can snuff out a flame with my fingers without any problem but the pain that lurks constantly within my bones and crackles along my neural pathways in a never-ending journey can be unbearable.  Part of the problem is the fact that my pain is not temporary but permanent.

At Pain Management, the physician's first statement threw me into despair, frankly.  He told me, 'You have to come to terms with the fact that you probably will be in pain for the rest of your life.'  I retorted, 'Thank you very much!  That's precisely what I needed to hear!'

He then explained that it was because of this that I had been sent to him and that the purpose of Pain Management was to make it possible for me to lead a life as free from that pain as he could make it.  Whether through medication, physical therapy or other procedures, the aim of Pain Management was enshrined in its name.  Our job together was to 'manage' the pain that was my constant undesired companion.  Instead of giving me false hope, he placed the facts before me and offered me the opportunity to make the best of a bad deal.  It actually WAS precisely what I needed to hear, after countless false promises from physicians, surgeons and the manufacturers of medications that were more likely to kill or cause permanent damage than to cure.

Long ago, years before Pain Management, I wrote poems about Pain as my true consort, one who had forced himself upon me, who raped me again and again and finally forced me to accept him as one who would be closer to the jugular than any human lover or spouse ever could be.  At that time, I did not realise that it was a prophecy.  I had thought it a temporary situation that a surgical procedure or other solution might fix.  As a girl who was introduced to severe cluster migraine headaches and terrible cramps at puberty, I was visited by pain at an early age.  Even before that, so-called 'growing pains' in my legs, which sound laughable to some, were my fate as they are for many children who grow too quickly.  I reached my ultimate height by the age of 10 and that accomplishment was negative for me in many ways,  Not only was I taller than most of the boys I knew but I was in terrible pain much of the time.  Nothing was done about that, nor about the rheumatic fever... ultimately one 'outgrew' both!

I never have liked running much but before I became disabled, I loved to walk.  In my early teens, I would walk to the beach before dawn each day to watch the sun rise and, perched upon my favourite outcrop of rocks, write in my journal before walking to school.  I always walked to and from school wherever I lived.  Not for me any other transportation.  It never was offered as an alternative but to be honest, except for some nasty early encounters on the old 'bridle path' that ran between one of our houses and the road that led to my school, I treasured those walks.  I loved Nature and still do.  The rising of the sun and birds, the fresh wind blowing from the ocean and even the early morning fog that often marked the first half of our day all delighted me.  The nasty little boy who exposed himself on the bridle path repeatedly and probably now is President of a local Bank (have to Google that one!) was a small price to pay for the freedom of being able to walk a mile to school.  (He actually was a schoolmate of mine but never a friend.  His actions therefore were disgusting and rather shocking but not as awful as those of the little boy who peed on my sister and I from the roof of his house when I was six years old!)

When I lived in Nepal, I walked to the Temple at dawn to watch the worshippers make their offerings and sacrifices.  When I lived in Southampton, I walked to University each day.  When I lived in London, I explored the city on foot and I did the same in Manhattan.   In particular, water and parks always attracted me.  Wherever I lived, I would try to find a destination that offered me a chance of communion with the waters.  In Manhattan, I walked to the East River almost daily as well as walking in the opposite direction to Central Park to visit 'my' Arctic Owl in the little old-fashioned Zoo there.

Not being able to walk properly has been almost as awful for me as the constant pain in which I live now.  I miss it terribly.  This has been a long, rambling preamble to the topic of 'virtual realities'.  It is these 'virtual realities' that now provide me with a facsimile of the experience that my real daily rambles provided before I became disabled.

Many people in my real life are a little contemptuous of gaming and the concept of virtual realities.  Whether it is 'serious' games or what is known as 'casual gaming', they fail to comprehend the attraction that games have for individuals in my position.

For me, it is another aspect of pain management but it can provide other positive effects for individuals who live in less than ideal circumstances.  When one is accustomed to large rooms and beautiful surroundings, living in a tiny room without any view can be depressing.  A farming simulation game can provide vistas that cannot be obtained otherwise at that stage in the individual's life.  Those who are trying to 'kick' an undesirable habit, whether it is overeating or smoking, often find games to be a positive distraction, keeping them from another journey to the kitchen or another smoke.

I almost immediately equated games like FarmVille, Fantasy Kingdoms and Family Farm with the idea of the 'Zen Garden'.  The repetitive acts of planting and harvesting are calming to the nerves and soothing to the spirit.  Moreover, even if the crops and fruits one obtains exist only in a virtual world, the act is a positive one.  One is interacting in a wholly positive fashion with the virtual Mother Goddess, Nature in all her glory and bounty.  What is the difference between lighting a candle at the altar of Our Lady and the act of harvesting a field of beautiful roses and carnations?  It is all in the heart of the individual who performs the act.  For me, it is an act of homage, of reverence and worship.  Whatever exists in farming simulation games is based upon something real.  Art imitates Life and a farming simulation game imitates one of the earliest exchanges of humanity with Nature.  It is the act of nurturing the land in order to share in its gifts.  For me, it is as close as I can come most of the time to the experiences I had when I had unfettered mobility in my real life.

This is a screenshot from Family Farm, a farming simulation game on Facebook.  Many 'farmers' use their land to grow as many crops as possible, as this increases their experience levels.  For me, though, games like this first and foremost have aesthetic significance and I try to create a landscape I enjoy, a place that will gladden my heart each time I visit.  Yes, I prefer the term 'visit' to the reality of 'logging on/in' to a game.

I love gardening but having moved frequently and having lived most of my adult life in large cities, I seldom had any opportunity to expeirence the joy of having a plot of land to tend.  It was only when I left Manhattan that I had a chance to plant trees and flowers and watch them grow.  Even after I became disabled, I struggled to maintain the garden until every one, including my physician, told me that it was counterproductive.  My pain levels always increased radically after any activity of that sort and I finally realised I was torturing myself, despite the joy that any interaction with the soil brought me.

These are Snowdrops I found in a local graveyard shortly after I moved here.  They were growing wild and I transplanted a few to my garden where they have multiplied over the years.  The Snowdrop always was one of my favourite flowers and its connection to the ancient Easter European Festival of Martisor delighted me.  It thrilled me to know that I had a few of these ancient harbingers of Spring in the garden.  I may not own this house but I was allowed to plant flowers and trees in a small garden that had been allowed to become a wasteland of ivy and weeds.

I planted a birch tree as well and marveled at its growth from a sapling to a strong, proud Goddess Tree.  It was upon the Birch Tree that George the Dragonfly left little messages and gifts for Freya when she was a child and upon the Goddess Tree that we tied the Martisor charms we made for one another.  Martisor was not a part of my own heritage but I believe in the universality of ancient festivals and rituals and it now has become a part of my own family's traditions.

I do not believe one should engage in virtual realities at the expense of real life but virtual realities can refuel the spirit and give one the energy one needs to confront unappealing or depressing facts.  They can provide the courage needed to 'soldier on' as it were.

Causes and Censorship

The virtual community/venue known as 'Facebook' or, more designated more charmingly as 'The Book of Faces' by my daughter is an interesting phenomenon for many reasons.  Unlike 'groups' or forums I visited in the early years of the internet, it embraces ALL things, including politics, social trends, gaming and simply gossip both public and private.

Many special interest groups as well as commercial advertisers piggyback on Facebook to reach a wide range of users.  One of the interesting aspects of Facebook is that 'Friendship' allows advertisers and political interest groups to target users it might not reach otherwise as one can have FB Friends who are quite the opposite of oneself in terms of social, economic, national and political affiliations.   Gaming in particular draws together individuals who ordinarily might not be 'Friends' for whatever reason.

The political interest groups involved in Facebook use, inter alia, a platform named 'Causes'.  One cannot participate in 'Causes' without giving the platform the right to post on ones own Timeline.  What this means is that ANY Friend can post a petition on MY Timeline unless I prohibit Causes completely from being part of my internet experience.  As Causes once in a blue moon has an active petition that I may wish to sign, I find myself in a position where I must monitor my Facebook page constantly in order to 'hide' petitions from other users that I do not wish to advertise, promote or sign.

It is here that I wish to make my position clear with respect to Censorship.  Many of the petitions circulating on Facebook deal with Censorship, pure and simple.  I personally am absolutely opposed to any sort of cruelty to Animals, but cannot espouse censorship of any kind.  Petitions that ask Facebook to remove a page or user because he/she/it promotes or accepts cruelty to Animals are advocating Censorship.  Cruelty to Animals and especially Animals particularly dear to my own heart may make me incandescent with rage, but I would be more inclined to mete out the same treatment to one who has been cruel to an innocent and helpless creature than ever to censor him or her.  (Fantasies of meting out a rude justice to a person who has been cruel to an Animal are nothing more than wishful thinking, by the way.  For better or worse,  I am not a Vigilante.)

I am a deeply spiritual individual and embrace a number of religious traditions to some extent, although organised religion for the most part frowns upon individuals who wish to worship in more than one Church/Mosque/Circle of Sacred Stones/Whatever.   On the other hand, I refuse to participate in witch-hunts against those who are irreligious or otherwise disrespectful of any religious belief, icon or 'sacred cow'.  I may find those people or attitudes personally repugnant but I would not sign any petition to censor any voice raised against religion.

This is not cowardice.  This is a matter of principle.  How can I expect to have the freedom to voice my opinion if I do not allow the same freedom to every one else?  The right to freedom of speech MUST be unequivocal and unrestricted or it is not true freedom of speech.  That is why I am diametrically opposed to the concept of 'political correctness' and 'hate crimes' based on name-calling.  A thorn by any other name is nonetheless a thorn.  Excrement is excrement whether you call it that or use a more basic term.  I do believe, however, that a person should possess the right to use ANY word or term, however pejorative.

If a crime of violence is committed, then action should be brought simply for that crime and not for any social or political attitude that might be inferred by any name-calling at the time the crime was committed.  If a man or woman commits murder, surely the punishment for that is sufficient.  Why should certain special interest groups or minorities be able to heap added punishment upon the perpetrator simply because he or she is considered a bigot or politically offensive by current standards?

Israeli law, for example, prohibits use of the term 'Nazi' to describe any Jew.  I would submit, humbly, that many official Israeli practices towards the Palestinians  are identical to those promoted by the Third Reich towards the Jews and other minorities.  Does Censorship improve human nature or somehow dispose of negative attitudes and actions?  Absolutely not.  What it promotes is inequality.  When a group of Black thugs commit assault towards a Caucasian and call him/her a 'Honky', the 'hate crime' legislation never goes into effect but should the positions be reversed, should a group of Caucasian thugs commit assualt towards a Black and call him/her a 'Nigger', it will be considered and prosecuted as a 'hate crime'.  Is this just?  Is this equality?  Is this even desirable?  Assault is an actionable crime.  I cannot see any justification really for making a crime against one sort of individual more heinous than it would be against another simply because of name-calling.  At the end of the day, name-calling is what fuels the ability to designate a crime as a 'hate crime'.  You can dress it up any way you like, but that is the truth.

I do not believe in discrimination by reason of race, religion, gender or creed or anything else, but I do not believe in Censorship or the concept of 'hate crimes' either.  It constitutes a sort of reverse discrimination in practice.  Furthermore, I do not think it acts as a deterrent of any kind, which means that its only effect is to give  a crime against a member of a special group a greater value than the same crime against an ordinary individual.

The Demise of the Fine Art of Editing

With the advent of the 'smartphone' and 'tablet', even more semi-literate individuals have joined the host of internet users and they often use their new capabilities to post comments on Facebook and even launch their own weblogs or join other forums where their views can be and are published regularly.

This is a wonderful social phenomenon actually.  It gives every one the potential to be a writer, social commentator, poet or critic of the arts, society, political realities or anything else beneath the Sun or Moon.  On the other hand, the ease with which any typed word can be published has brought any sort of standard of perfection in language or communication crashing down.  THAT is a tragedy and one that ultimately may have long-term consequences.

Another communication shortcut that is prevalent on the internet is that of copying and pasting the words, artwork or photograph of another.  Those who do not feel themselves up to the task of creating a witty epigram or incisive comment upon the state of the world often are able to find that their own views have been described quite aptly by some one else.  Another common motivation for publishing the art or words of another is the desire to entertain.  An amusing photograph or clever phrase may be shared over and over by various users of Facebook in the same way in what probably is an attempt to scatter sunbeams as widely as possible.

Once upon a time, even though writing required a great deal of effort, whether achieved through the use of an ink pen or typewriter,  most writers took some care to improve their initial thoughts and outpourings by editing them.  There were first draughts and second draughts and final versions of documents, whether non-fiction, prose fiction or poetry.  The 'art of writing' was given serious consideration by most individuals with any aspirations to have their work read by more than one recipient.

Now any one can publish a word or volume with a single click and ironically, although editing could be performed with far less effort than in pre-internet days, few individuals bother to improve their initial messages.  It is not simply a matter of spelling errors or poor grammar either.  The effects of instant publication are far more grievous in terms of social communication.  People often are thoughtless, cruel or nasty and even more often, simply devoid of common courtesy in their internet communications with others.  Despite the fact that the technology gives users far more time to improve their messages, most people post in haste to repent (or not) at leisure.

I am as guilty as any one else of carelessness in publishing without taking extra time to improve my posts or messages.  I suppose I justify it with a belief that, if I do not publish mu thoughts immediately, especially where this weblog is concerned, I probably never will do so at all.   Nonetheless, it is what an old friend of mine called 'diarrhea' writing at its worst: from the brain through the fingers without pausing to consider or weigh each word.

I should make a resolution to craft prose in the same judicious fashion as any serious poet, making every word count and reverberate not only with significance but with eloquent beauty.  Perhaps I shall... but then, will I ever publish another word or remain mute forevermore?

N.B.  Literacy isn't everything by any means.  There are many geniuses who lack the tools to be truly exceptional writers in terms of form or style but whose ideas are exceptional.

The Genius of 'Secretary'

I never imagined I would love a film about Male Dominance and a female submissive but 'Secretary' with James Spader is a delightful, quirky, utterly irresistible film.  It is a romance about two characters who are utterly at odds with normal, conventional society, who both suffer silently in their own isolated worlds but who manage to create an incredible bond.  It is highly entertaining while being extraordinarily erotic.  In short, it is brilliant.  James Spader in the role of Mr. Grey smoulders with repressed sexual appeal.

'Secretary' belongs in the same class  as 'The Extra Man' and 'Lars and the Real Girl'   All three are films about individuals who find a way that differs from the ordinary, who triumph over social alienation by demanding recognition of their own unique vision.  All three prove that self-respect can bloom in the most outlandish gardens.

Lord of the Rings and the Achilles' Heel of the Internet

Long ago, when Peter Jackson's 'Lord of the Rings' was new and we had made our pilgrimage to the cinema again and again to revel in the marvelous facsimile of Middle Earth he had brought to life, EA Games released both 'Two Towers' and 'Return of the King' to the Playstation 2 and other console systems.

With some games, cheat codes work from the start.  With 'Return of the King', the cheat codes only were set to operate IF and ONLY IF one first beat the game.  We did so together and saved the results to a Memory Card. 

Years later, with the release of 'The Hobbit', one yearned to return to the world of LoTR via the old PS2 games.  Much knowledge had been lost... or as Galadriel beautifully declared:  'Much that once was is lost, for none now live who remember it.'    My combat skills were rusty and I certainly did not recall any of the codes for the game...

I therefore went to the internet sources, to IGN, Gamespot and even Wikipedia.  They ALL gave cheat codes for 'Return of the King', including the code for Invulnerability, aka 'God Mode'. 

In every Walkthrough or Cheat site, the code is given as:  Square, Circle, Square, Down.  One is told to pause the game after loading any level via the Start button and then, after holding down L1, L2, R1 and R2 simultaneously, to press the four buttons in the order given.

In those days, I had yet to publish any game guides.  I had sent a number of hints, corrections and tips for the GBA LoTR games to Gamespot when I discovered that no one had published them, but that was the extent of my strategy input to the internet pool of knowledge.  

I therefore did not have my own game guide at hand.  I thought that, as all sites gave the same directions, they would be accurate.  Well, the code for Invulnerability DOES NOT WORK!!!  How on earth could people submit guides or information to Wikipedia without testing the codes first???  It is this sort of outrageous lack of responsibility that inspired me originally to begin to write my own strategy guides.

Never mind that 'Return of the King' now is an old game made for a system that has been superceded by a newer one.  It remains a wonderful game and certainly one of the few that actually makes the player feel he/she has stepped into the world of Middle Earth as made manifest by Peter Jackson.  It was for that reason that I wished to play the game again but I did not wish to be burdened with the stress of risking death constantly.  I wished to walk through the levels with my health intact in order simply to experience them.  I had thought that existing internet guides would allow this, especially as we had beat the game years ago and saved the result.

At first I thought it might be a problem with the controller...  I then thought it might be a problem with the manner in which I had input the code.  An hour later, I began to try different variations on the given code and finally discovered that it had been copied again and again with one inaccurate direction.

The real code for God Mode or Invulnerability is:

Square, Circle, Square, UP.

Press the Start Button to pause the game after loading any level, then press down L1, L2, R1 and R2 simultaneously.  While those buttons remain depressed, enter: Square, Circle, Square, UP.

Your character will be invulnerable.

I always realised that 'facts' given solely on the internet were only as good as the person who submitted them.  It disturbs me when students, whether at school or university, use internet sources as their sole sources for research.  Too much is inaccurate, whether due to negligence or outright duplicity.

When I was a child, i wrote essays at school frequently that cited 'original sources' that I had invented.  I used Old English, Middle English, Old Norse and Medieval French as well as the spelling popular in every bigone era in the English language to create these so-called original sources.  They ranged from inscriptions carved on stones by Vikings to a private journal kept by Jean Lafitte.  I was astounded by the fact that not one teacher ever asked for any evidence whatsoever as to the actual existence of any of these 'sources'.  I certainly would have done so had I been in charge...

Well, the world is lazy or gullible.  How many people believed in George Bush's spurious claim of 'weapons of mass destruction' in the hands of Iraq prior to his invasion despite the fact that no such weapons existed?   How many people still swallow the 'official' version of the events that occurred on 11 September and that were the ostensible reason for the creation of the vague 'war on terror'? 

Those lies and half-lies have been responsible for the deaths and suffering of millions.  The inaccurate code given for the PS2 'Return of the King' game may be responsible only for the frustration of an unspecified number of players who wished to achieve Invulnerability and were unable to do so.  Nevertheless, I cry 'Shame' upon all the sites that are willing to publish guides that are inaccurate as well as the writers of said guides who obviously take information from other sources and copy and paste it into their own work without ever troubling to discover if it is correct or not.